Social Media Etiquette: 18 Tips

Antique Etiquette Book

Despite the waning popularity of respect in today’s society, the online community tends to enforce a set of unwritten “rules” of social media. Those who ignore or blatantly break these rules will be punished either by being exiled into the land of de-friend/un-follow or publicly blasted for rudeness (yes, that seems a bit hypocritical, but it happens). Before we delve too deep into our social media series, let’s take a few minutes to go over a few ways to make new friends and keep the old.

The Golden Rule of social media is — “Give More than You Receive.” All relationships are give and take, but statistics have proven that those who give online far more than they take gain the respect of others, which in turn spreads their influence and grows their communities. In my free report “Taming the TwitterBeast in 20 Minutes a Day,” I briefly mentioned a suggested 7-1 ratio of information tweets to personal promotion tweets. People who tweet one link after another that leads directly to a sales page are quickly unfollowed. That ratio seems to be a pretty good guideline, not only for Twitter, but for all social media platforms.

If someone were to write the Social Media Book of Etiquette, it would include the following 18 tips:

  1. Participate — Even if you schedule updates to post automatically, log into your communities and hang out. This doesn’t have to take hours, but by investing a few minutes to interact will pay long dividends in your community building efforts.
  2. Play Nice — If you take issue with someone in one of your communities, email them privately. Don’t gossip or belittle other members or companies.
  3. Be an Encourager — Congratulate those who have reached goals through little warm fuzzies. Give a virtual hug to those who are struggling.
  4. Be Sincere — Phonies are often lambasted in social communities. Be genuine when you post comments and interact.
  5. Don’t Beg — You are not a 3-year-old walking past an ice cream stand. Don’t act like it. The best way to get others to notice you, read your blog, buy your product, etc., is to interact in a positive way within the communities you’ve chosen to join.
  6. Be Patient — As Seth Godin says, “Drip. Drip. Drip.” Remember that each drip contributes to the stream of traffic that is flowing toward your site!
  7. Put In Time — Don’t walk on the scene and expect to be an instant star. Putting In Time is the PITS, but it is how stars are born. Queen Latifah said it only took her 15 years to become an overnight success. She put in her time first.
  8. Offer Value — If you only implement one item on this list, this would be a good one to pick. Contributing thoughtful and informative comments and answering questions will build your respect within a community quicker than any other tactic. Plus, helping others just makes us feel better about ourselves.
  9. Guard Your Online Reputation — Implement a Google Alert for your name and/or blog name. See what others are saying about you. Make sure everything you post online is positive and easily understood so others won’t take it wrong.
  10. Say Please and Thank-you — Barney (the purple dinosaur) was right about that one. They really are the magic words.
  11. Be Relevant — I mentioned the “I Like Turtles” kid in a post about blog commenting. When you post, focus on contributing to the topic.
  12. Don’t Overdo It — Think of a very spoiled dog, vying for your attention. My dog, “Miss I’m Too Cute and Adorable to Potty Outside,” is extremely needy to the point of being annoying at times. While yes, she is adorable and we do dote on her, she often over-does her demands for attention.
  13. Smile — Use emoticons. A smile is a universal feel-good gesture. It’s always in vogue.
  14. Contribute Quality — A quick pat on the back comment, such as “Great post!” is encouraging to another blogger or community member, but a more helpful comment would be, “The tip you offered about ____ has made a big difference in my online media strategy. Thank you!”
  15. Listen to the Conversation — Read the other comments so you’ll know what’s already been said and see how you can interact, either by agreeing or disagreeing (politely, of course), asking a question, or explaining something more fully that someone may not have understood.
  16. Make Others Look Good — When I was hired at one company, the trainer told me that my job was to make my immediate supervisor look like the best supervisor in the place. That is leadership from the bottom up, and many companies would do well to train that principle to their employees. That was one of the most enjoyable job experiences I’ve had, and it’s a great principle to apply to all parts of our lives — family, friends, and within our online communities.
  17. Use Your Own Voice — Be natural and real within your communities. Let people get to know you as a person, not an electronic signature.
  18. Observe — How do the leaders of the community engage and interact with others? What can you learn by observing them?
  19. Any more? —What “social graces” have you picked up through your online community interactions? Add to this list in the comments section.

Think of social media interaction like a global game of ping-pong. Volley back and forth within your online communities. Sometimes you’ll score points, sometimes you won’t, but you the best part of social media interactions isn’t necessarily scoring — it’s enjoying the game.

Until next time,

Happy Blogging!

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#1 Social Media Etiquette: 18 Tips « On Blogging Well on 02.03.10 at 7:22 am

[…] The Golden Rule of social media is — Give More than You Receive. Today’s post at On Blogging Well builds on that principle by adding 18 tips for building online relationships. […]

#2 riat8 on 02.04.10 at 11:42 am

thank you for the tips. a very helpful read.

#3 Bridget on 01.25.12 at 4:18 pm

I love the tips. I’ve found that hoot suite is an awesome resource to help me plan my posts on social media sites, but it is very important that I do log in each day and make sure I check for comments and respond. I love that I can do that from my phone. :)

I will be sharing this with others! Thanks so much! :)

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